tumblr_mdwqqzd1eH1rsbrhao1_500When we meet people in real life, we usually end up dating people who are not 100% like our ideal partner.While secretly we may be hoping to one day marry Johnny Depp or Cameron Diaz, we often bend the rules and fall in love with other people too. More often than not, when we look back on our choice of past partners we find that they had some qualities we didn’t like.

Had we been able to design the perfect partner, he would have perhaps been a little thinner, a bit richer, and maybe slightly less grumpy in the morning. Yet here we were, quite happily dating people who weren’t technically our ideal match. Would those people have made the cut online? On facebook of sex dating sites, you can only contact people through a filter: either your search criteria or the site’s own assessment of you and your requirements. Anyone who doesn’t fit the bill, anyone who doesn’t look good on paper, will be kept away. You will simply not see him.

Knowing what’s important
If you want to keep your options reasonably open, you will need to have a think about the makings of your ideal partner and see what qualities you would be willing to compromise on for the right person. Obviously, some things are more important than others.You may want some-one who shares your religious beliefs or political outlook, for example, and refuse to even look at anyone who doesn’t comply with these requirements. Other things, such as eye colour, profession, etc., may be a bit less important to you, but really important to someone else.When designing your search, it’s worth remembering that the more detailed your search criteria are, the more limiting they would be.You may want someone who is 25-35 years of age, but what if he was perfect for you in every other way but was actually 24 or 36? You may specify that you prefer someone who is a non-smoker, but what if you met someone who was otherwise perfect but smoked? The answers to these are entirely individual and you should be honest with yourself about what you would and wouldn’t agree to settle for before making your choices.

There is no harm in starting your search on facebook of sexby looking for your perfect man or woman. However, if you find that you are not getting as many results as you might like (which will probably be the case if you have a very specific set of requirements), expand your criteria slowly, making adjustments as you go along. Start with the things that matter the least and keep expanding until you’ve reached the realm of your deal breakers: there is no reason to search for people you are not likely to ever want to date.